Hologram Thoughts

To look into the blue diamond
to wander through the fields of gold
to smile at the moon and see her smile back

To listen to the birds of paradise
to speak with the wind
to wash away your sins in the streams of tears

To accept the sun upon your neck
– golden skin and sweat stained cotton
to see the life within the dirt at your feet

Questioning your thoughts
each one new and unique in this moment
each one eternally old, shared among the stars

Sometimes I want to scream
to beg
to plead

Sometimes I want to smile
to sigh
to close my eyes and just be

Sometimes I am alone
in a room full of people
invisible

Sometimes my heart is torn
swollen and bruised
unable to beat

Sometimes there is silence
even as birds sing
because I am without you

Sometimes I am hopeful
that you will see me
that you will welcome me
that you will allow

Sometimes I am scared.

What will it take to make me listen?
What will it take to make me see with out distortion?
What will it take to make me understand,
to make me care,
to make me forgive,
to let me feel love.

What will it take to make me notice,
to make me pay attention,
to calm me down,
to smile again,
to smell the rain and not fear the floods.

What will it take to wake me up?
What will it take to change my ways,
to hear the cries,
to pick them up and set them right,
to hold you through the night?

What will it take to make it right?
What will it take to make me cry?
to make me hate,
to make me beg,
to let you go,
What will it take?