Tag Archive for "suffering"
This spring we have been given more rain in my city than anyone would have expected. Everything is lush and green. Lawns are thick and strong, flowers are blooming everywhere you look, trees seem to radiate variations of green, and every creek is flowing; good times right?
By this time of the year we are usually watering our lawns and gardens almost daily to keep them growing, to keep the sun from burning them and shriveling the life out of them. Some years we already have cracks and fissures running in our lawns, the earth dry enough to cause little rips and tears in the the ground.
But this year, with the rains, we should all be so happy, ecstatic that the earth has gifted us so plentifully with water than everything is growing. But we aren’t. We are dealing with swollen and overflowing creeks and rivers. Flooding in the streets, our homes and yards. Streets that have been swept away by the rushing waters.
If the rains had not come we would have suffered just as much, but in different ways. Nothing makes us happy. Yesterday at work I heard a coworker say that she wished the rains would go away for a few months and I thought how dangerous that was. Words have power, her intention has energy and strength; yet she has no idea what she is asking for.
She would not be any happier if the temperature was 95 degrees and sweltering. The rains might be an inconvenience in her mind, but they are what they are. A part of life.
I don’t mind the rain; it smells wonderful, everything is green and lush. Soon enough they will be gone and all of those people upset at the heavy rains will long for them as the sun pushes us over the 100 degree mark in the middle of the coming summer.
Just be mindful, realize how magical life is and smile. There is nothing you can do about it anyway.
Some one I trust just reminded me that teaching prematurely is a trap. I told him as I have told you in the past; I am not a teacher. What I write here and present to you are my own thoughts backed up solely by my own understanding and reasoning. I am not now, nor will I ever be a true teacher of the Dharma or anything else for that matter.
I am someone who likes to discuss subjects of interest to me, and that will not stop. As I say many times in many posts, I am no authority, these are just my thoughts.
I have a hard enough time living my own life by a standard I am happy with, much less asking anyone to follow my words or actions.
Any way, I just wanted to make sure any one who read my words knew that I in no way am trying to present my self as a teacher of any kind.
Peace,
Matt
A few months ago I lost someone whom I always considered my uncle. He was not related to my family by blood, but rather by friendship, sometimes that is stronger than blood though. I had grown up thinking that his family was related to us, I guess I thought that his wife was my mother’s sister, they even look alike. They were and are best friends, so we simply spent a lot of time together as families.
I am grown now and I long ago realized that we were not actually blood relatives, but that never really mattered to us. I do not actually see his daughter much anymore, but she is still someone I consider family. I see his wife, my ‘aunt’, more often and though we do not sit and talk, we do exchange hugs and that look that tells each other that we are special and loved.
At his funeral I was sitting in a pew with my wife, my sister and my mother. My mom was strong and though I know she was hurting for the loss of her friend and for her best friend, she smiled a lot at people that she spoke to that day. That stayed with me.
The lesson I really paid attention to that day was deeper though: make your life mean something.
I listened that day to his friends and co-workers talk about the kind of man he was, the kind of friend and person he was. I had known he was a good father already, and he was a nice guy to me growing up. He even offered me advice when I was joining the Corps. But now I was hearing about him from his co-workers and from the people that worked for him.
They missed his voice, his reassuring hand on their back, his leadership and his trust. This hit home to me, I started to wonder what my friends and family would say if that was me in the casket one day soon. Would they beam about me? Would they tell stories about how I had made their life better? Would they mourn not having me with them every day?
I don’t know if I became a better person that day, but I know I started thinking about my legacy then. How will I be seen tomorrow by the people that are in my life? I know my wife would miss me, I know my children would and my family would. But the people I see in the hallway at work, would they miss me? Have I been good to them? Have I touched their life in a way that was helpful and sincere? Did I offer them anything that was worthwhile on their journey?
The Buddha said “Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.”
My uncle clearly lit thousands of candles, now I am working on it too.
